4 Fuks Saké

A Quality Newspaper.

An endearing Sun promo celebrating 40 years of the 'UK's favourite handheld,' with respect to Apple.

It's Not Rock It's Science

Just written an article on music, brands, sponsorship and 2010 for someone, so why not post it here too. Thanks to John Tyrrell for the gag, 5 years ago.

Download Music In 2010

Clever Shit #103: Gordon Gustavsson, IKEA Malmo

Been working with IKEA for all of 3 weeks now. If this quality of brain power exists inside their business, well, it should be fun.

Money. Twitter. Measurement. The Usual.

Go online, look for social media debate around Twitter, and you're a click away from two debates.

1. How does anyone make any money from Twitter?

2. How do you measure ROI on social media?

The answer to the first one is simple. Go into the conference production business, or start manufacturing lanyards. The big winners so far are anybody who cashes in on the thousands of bodies in and around the industry short on paid-for client work, and long on love of the sound of their own voice.

If you can't beat them, join them. So yesterday, Mike took his business cards down to the O2. Don't watch Olly Murs clips - kick off your shoes and enjoy all 17 minutes of it. James Poulter is your host.

Second, here courtesy of David Berkowitz has written an outstanding post - 100 ways to measure social media. There is one flaw. If I'm a client, I still can't work out whether any of them will increase sales of my product. 

Currently working on this. When it's done, 4 Fuks Saké readers will get first dibs on the tickets to the resultant conference in the New Year.

Advertising That Works #2

And then you see this.

And it might just be enough to kid yourself that you'll be greeted with a smile and tray of non-shit food. Fair do's to all concerned at Leo Burnett and Ronald's HQ.

Advertising That Works #1

It broke a while ago, but saw it on Tottenham Ct Road tube platform for the first time today. I don't really get the 'desperation' angle. This is absolute class.

Fair play to M&C Saatchi for developing it, and for the client for buying it. People will do exactly what the poster tells them to. Which is the whole point isn't it?

Beauty & The Bollocks

According to The Guardian yesterday this was ninth in one global viral video chart. 80% of people who watched this film in the US, said they were less likely to text when driving. It cost £10,000 and was made by a film maker and local students in Gwent.

How much did Diageo pay to shoot 7 minutes of Robert Carlyle's beautiful looking whisky epic? How much money will they spend on media, on seeding costs, on promotion and PR of said film? How much time was spent in meetings, presentations, focus groups and rounds of research to produce it? How much more whisky will be sold as a result?

1. Which do you think is the most effective piece of work?

2. Who are the winners and losers here?

Big Business

Big Brother "axed" says The Sun. Before you take the piss, was it your idea to knock up a portakabin and then make £25million a year? The format deserves to go down as one of the great business achievements in television history.

Channel 4 and Endemol deserve nothing but respect for devising a format that is commercially stupendous, and still looks ahead of its time, (even if the content it produces has become just a little predictable). Its simplicity is everything. Stick some people in a box, peer at them via your TV, mobile, computer or tabloid newspaper and then persuade people to spend more money sending texts, making calls, buying the sponsor's products. People do.

Endemol CEO Tim Hincks says Big Brother "is the only really convincing multiplatform idea and format in the UK". He could add the world - the format has been exported to over 70 countries. In reality, there are shit loads of them - but Hincks' people showed them the path to gold.

Can't wait to see the back of it myself. And that's nothing but pure jealousy.

The Swayze And Wenger Legacies

We now have confirmation courtesy of yesterday's 'Swayze Dead' Twitter trending, that your Mum & Dad will be on Twitter by the end of the year. Not that we were far off anyway. Reading Women's Weekly last night, I couldn't help but notice the magazine take a virulent stand against @schofe for 'tweeting' on his 'Memorial For Dad Weekend Mini-Break'.

Rumour is the most effective vehicle to promote a new communication channel or device. There is a precedent in email.

Yesterday's 'trending' took us all back to the mid 90s, and a tasteful song that stays with us to this day. Generally, a Man United v Arsenal fixture at Old Trafford isn't complete without a 5 minute chant of "Sit down you paedophile," sung vile-ly at Arsene Wenger.

Back in 1996, the UK was on the cusp of embracing email. Only senior management or people you didn't really know, had email addresses. We didn't really get it. Those that did - and the finger at the time was pointed to blokes in the City - recognised you could shuttle information around at rapid pace whether it was true or not.

At 2pm on a random Tuesday I was faxing press releases directly to bins in newsrooms. By 2.30pm, Ian Lessey in accounts was running around the office telling everyone that Wenger had apparently been "busted by cops in a hotel room." By 2.45pm William Hill had stopped taking bets on him being fired and by 4pm, he was on the steps of Highbury issuing a full denial.

By 5pm everyone realised it was total bollocks, was a bit confused, but wanted 'in' on this email thing.

Now everyone knows a little more about how Twitter works. I'm sure it's what Patrick would have wanted.

Talent

The son and heir to 4 Fuks Saké has changed the dynamic of Friday mornings. Pre and post his arrival the net effect is the same. Thursday night drinking has been replaced by Thursday night screaming. The walk to the station is melancholy. Today I long to sit in silence at Chester-Le-Street under two jumpers and switch my phone off.

I spent 90p on The Guardian. 60 minutes later, all change. I was spat out of the Northern Line at Tottenham Court Road, spirits lifted, and thinking ‘what excellent value for money.’ What the digital / media debate continues to forget is that I spend my 90p on talent, not on sheets of paper or a format. Talent has a price and it's worth paying for. 

Whilst the parallels are often drawn between the revenue models of news media and music (why pay when you can get music/info for free), the debate also conveniently avoids other entertainment vehicles.

Take sport. Should we perhaps convince Arsenal fans not to spend fifty quid on an Emirates ticket on the grounds that there's plenty of football to watch on Hackney Marshes? It's not going to happen.

So why would anyone NOT want to pay for good writing? Reading isn't a function, it's a pleasure.

For my 90p and mood shift I got Marina Hyde’s clinical knifing of Trudie Styler.

Or Harry Pearson…“An English-style centre-forward,” words which are to football what the phrase “contains mechanically reclaimed meat” is to fine dining."

Try The Eurovision “night of a thousand key changes,” guide.

Or Tim Dowling’s MPs expenses quiz.

Paul Calf once said, “you can’t buy class.” He’s right. Newspapers may change their formats and delivery systems, but as long as they supply collections of high quality, talented writing, people will pay. I don't give a monkeys whether I give my 90p to a man in a shop or I drop the coins in the slot on my computer - I'm paying the brand that brings it to me.

These people are professionals. We are amateurs. They’re worth a few quid. 90p's a steal.